For the past God-knows-how-long months I've been meddling in this awful situation .. I've started to discover who I am...
I've learnt my limitations, I've learnt that when I'm the most upset- that is who I really am..That's who Agnes is.
The trip to Bali - Perth - Melbourne have opened my mind *somehow* in trying to finding ME in me.
I realized I have been whining a lot because I just simply can't face what's on my plate right now.. Then so many things have freshened my heart and soul that now.. I hope..really hope I can control myself before I swear and whine.
So many people's attitudes and values can be learnt from the trip. It's about how to be a better Agnes and what values to hold to:*these are the words they could've said to me/how I interpret it myself by observing them*
Shinya: Live a carefree life! Enjoy the ride! But keep your manners with you.
My Brother: Have some sense of humor..A good friend for the soul.
My Sister: Just be jollyyy!
Cindy: Stay faithful with God and do good works in His Name..Wonderful outcomes!
Claris: Loose weight to the ideal kg..Do not be tempted so easily!
Kim: First, let's see who we are in the mirror before judging others doing good / bad stuffs.
Kelvin: Forever Young ..Age is just numbers.
Larry: Just pray and endure..Only God can change people's hearts
Molen: You don't need 2 years of courtship before you get married.. 2 months sound good when you've been friends with the guy all these years.
I've learnt loads from books and parents of course, and just now.. The wife of my senior pastor (from my mum's church in Jakarta) whom I sought counsel to, have given me comforting words of wisdom..which I would like to share to those who are reading this:
About My Current Challenging Situation:
Do not plunge myself too deep to "the situation".. And if I am close to God and stay faithful, there's no such thing as descendant's curse following me around because the curse has been broken by His blood and mercy. So, keep holding on to God's righteous hand!
About The Situation (the awful case I'm experiencing right now) Affecting Personal Love Story (Who Could Back-Off and Leaving me Astray):
God is the God who provides. He has the right guy in store for me . All I have to do is to just be myself and believe that God is preparing and equipping him right now (And God is preparing me as well..for him). It's my love story anyway - not anyone else - not even my parents.
Thank you God for the insights.. :)
I know I will have to face reality 2morrow .. but with these insights in hand, I shall hold 'em tight.. Come on Agnes, you've graduated, this is your new life!!
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